31 Post Surgery

He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.

1 Thessalonians 5:23-24

17th December 2024

It’s 21 days since my surgery. By the Grace of God I am making extremely good progress.

The whole process was an adventure from the time we arrived at King’s at 7am. Procedures were explained, consents were signed and tests completed. The whole process, from start to finish would take about 4 hours. After a long journey to the theatre in a wheel chair at 9.30 where I bade my husband farewell, I actually walked into the operating theatre and ingloriously scrambled onto the bed where I was prepared for surgery. I lost count of the number of times I was asked that morning to confirm my details each time I saw someone new.

In the days leading up to surgery, I asked God for a supernatural experience during the surgery; I was hoping for a trip into the spiritual realms. But nothing like that happened. I was just in deep sleep the whole time. Right up until the actual surgery, God continued to remind me that his hands were covering the back of my neck; keeping it stable and alleviating many of the symptoms. I sensed that God’s hands had moved aside for the duration for the surgery, so that the surgeons could work. I had every confidence that God was capable of healing me supernaturally and without surgery, so I felt there had to be another reason for God wanting me to go ahead with the operation. However, I wasn’t yet receiving clarity about what that was.

I had hoped to say something spiritual which I had prepared in advance but there was no opportunity as I apparently needed oxygen, and I discovered that no one can hear you speak with an oxygen mask on. As time went on under the oxygen mask, I realised I was beginning to lose my nerve. At one point I fleetingly thought, “I’ve changed my mind, I don’t want to do this.” Over the past few years God has been working specifically in the area of trusting him and I immediately reminded and reassured myself that God had directed me down this path. I recall thinking that this was the closest that I would be to ever understanding what it was like for Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. Still, there could never be an adequate comparison to what Jesus went through.

I also recognised that in the weeks leading up to this day, God’s protective covering had been over me, protecting me against the many arrows that were being fired to undermine the peace I believed God had given me. Unique had been facing some challenges at university which could not be easily resolved or fixed. I was finding it hard not to parachute in and rescue, so my stress levels were high and peace over these issues was hard to keep. The initial peace I had about Unique coping with living away from home, seemed to have evaporated. What people may term as a series of unfortunate coincidences or bad luck, Sod’s Law or Murphy’s Law – take your pick – had all been at play. It was as though they all collided at once. Fortunately I felt that God was highlighting them to me and enabling me to discern them as tactics. But it didn’t stop me from fretting, which was to impact my blood pressure over the next few weeks.

As expected, I took hours to wake up after surgery. This is the usual pattern for me. I made several failed attempts to open my eyes when being woken but then, almost immediately fell asleep again. Somewhere in the midst of that I knew that Geof needed to be updated.

I was expected back on the ward at about 2pm but Geof had heard nothing while he waited in the day room. I can’t imagine what was going through his mind during that time. At around 5pm Geof bumped into the surgeon who confirmed that, after visiting his patients in recovery, he was informed I had been admitted to the ward an hour before. Meanwhile, I managed to stay awake long enough to ask someone to contact Geof.

My stay on the ward was just two days long and was dominated by endless rounds of monitoring and medication, even through the night. My left arm, also being the worst damaged, was rendered useless due to the canula in my elbow and the frequent blood pressure monitoring. I was privileged to have a side room which meant I could play worship music the whole time without keeping anyone awake. That first evening was spent familiarising myself with the new sensations, or lack thereof. My arms and legs initially were very unstable and unreliable and I required assistance to do anything involving moving from a lying position. There were definitely some immediate improvements too, including no longer having pain in the tips of my little and ring fingers of my left hand. However, my thumb and forefinger were completely numb right down to my wrist and felt as though they had been smashed with a mallet. This was a completely new symptom.

After Geof went home, I settled down for the night and I began to chat to God, as I do. I asked him why I didn’t get to have a spiritual encounter during the surgery. God suddenly gave me a picture of me being baptised again in something like a river. My old body was being submerged but I did not come up straight away. I lay floating on the water. God showed me that it was not yet time for me to fully come out of the water and I sensed that his hands were once again covering my neck as he continued the healing process.

Over the next two days, aside from the regular observations, I met the team of surgeons, who informed me that the surgery, though tricky, had been successful and that my spinal cord was fully decompressed. The specialist neurosurgery nurse talked me through post operative care at home. She arranged for the hospital physio therapist to give me exercises and for the speech and language therapist to assess my swallowing and give me guidance before I could go home. Up to that point I was only eating foods I could easily swallow such as cottage pie and rice pudding.

I give thanks and glory to God for the knowledge and skills of the surgeons and for the developments in neurosurgery. That someone would choose this as a career is beyond my understanding but I am so grateful that they choose to do it. The surgeons and doctors were all professional and understanding from beginning to end. The nursing team, a number of whom are Christians, took excellent care of my medical needs and treated me with dignity and respect. I thank God for our NHS and pray that God will continue to bless this service with wisdom and resources.

I came home at the end of day 2 post surgery, armed with information sheets, a range of medication and Theraputty for hand strengthening. I ate soup and went to bed, where I stayed for day three. By Saturday, day 4, I had had enough and was ready to shower with assistance and be guided up and downstairs by my ever attentive husband. I had set up a WhatsApp group to coordinate ‘babysitters’ to stay with me and be on hand while I ate, took my meds or needed to go upstairs when Geof was not around. I’m ever grateful for their support in spending time with me and praying while Geof attended to his Christmas commitments. On Sunday, Geof decided to fit a second stair rail, after watching me go up it sideways so as to have both hands on the one existing rail. Everyone has used it since; even Unique, as though it has always been there.

I was taking codeine which has a notorious side effect which requires a mild laxative but this particular capsule was difficult to swallow and frequently got stuck. The lodged capsule needed to be coaxed down with soft food and a warm drink which dissolved it and tasted like burning in my throat. Swallowing continued to be problematic for the first couple of weeks so Geof took advantage of the opportunity to cook creatively, making a delicious mushroom risotto and a moreish bread and butter pudding, both for the first time ever. But my favourite meals were fresh tortelloni. After just a few days at home I was able to boil these up myself and add a ready made sauce, under supervision and assistance of course, as my manual dexterity and coordination were significantly impaired.

Another unexpected new symptom had arisen which I put down to having my head and neck manipulated. I had severe bouts of vertigo causing nausea and light headedness. It took a while to identify has I had not suffered from vertigo for years. Initially, we suspected my blood pressure which we did determine was a bit high. My friend F came round with some delicious home made soup which I thoroughly enjoyed. She asked about my hearing aids, which I had not worn as I did not want them to get lost in the hospital. I had also been wearing a mask when I was out and about in the few weeks leading up to surgery. The hearing aids, mask straps and spectacle arms frequently ended up in a tangle, so I stopped wearing the hearing aids. As I was searching for a song to play on my phone, it connected to my Bluetooth hearing aids, which I then had to turn off. Within a few minutes, I felt light headed and a huge wave of nausea rose up and bile filled my mouth. It took several minutes to pass while I sat as still as possible. There was no way I was going to lose that soup. The hearing aids are back in the box for now.

By the beginning of week two, I was able to eat a greater variety of food that was soon practically back to normal and my passion for tortellini continued. The pills however, were continuing to pose a challenge with the occasional choking incident. The vertigo episodes had stopped, although my blood pressure still seemed high. I was now showering unsupervised and Geof felt able to leave me on my own for an hour or so, provided I stayed on one level of the house.

Then it was also time to soak off the Sterri strips. They were however, impervious to the shower and it was recommended that you soak them off in the bath. Now that is all well and good if your Sterri strips are not in your neck; I would need to be practically submerged. So instead, I lowered myself into the bath while holding onto the sides, causing my shoulders to shrug upwards. Given that my arms were already weak, I felt my shoulder muscles strain. I lay down flat, which is actually easy for me to do and Geof filled the bath until it covered the surgical site. I am not a fan of  having water in my ears, which is why I hate swimming, so I lay there in the bath for about twenty minutes with my fingers sealing both ear canals. It is very weird listening to someone speak while under water. Thankfully though the Sterri strips came off without any tugging. However, getting out of the bath was more difficult as my arms had nothing left in them, so Geof had to pull me out unceremoniously, which aggravated my shoulder still further.

It was not until later that I realised that this was similar to the baptism image I received from God; me continuing to lie in the water before being ready to emerge from the water. I also had a sense that God’s hands were returning to cover and protect my vertebrae as my restoration continued.

By the start of the third week, I no longer needed round the clock supervision as long as Geof was around when I took my medication. I was practically weaned off the codeine by now too. I was managing the stairs confidently and my legs were 95% reliable and functioning, as long as I remembered to walk about frequently. I have been to our church Christmas Fair and Nativity Service and a quick visit to M&S.

In terms of my symptoms, they can be separated into sensory and motor categories. My legs are 100% functional but require strengthening and are 95% sensitive. There are a couple of dead spots on my left leg where my skin does not register touch or the flow of water accurately. My neck and shoulders are still very painful when I lie down despite the various orthopaedic and memory foam pillows I have tried. I am fairly certain this had been exacerbated getting in and out of the bath. I am using a very soft roll pillow at present and sleep on my back. I cannot roll more than 10 degrees either side as this compresses my shoulders and damaged nerves, causing severe neuropathic discomfort in my arms. My right forearm and hand then feel as though they have been rummaging in the freezer though they are warm to touch. The left side of my neck and left shoulder are painful and can spasm for up to one hour.

Sensory damage remains in the tips of all the fingers in my left hand and I am unable to accurately interpret what I am touching without looking. Motor control, coordination and dexterity is also significantly impaired still. And all of this is much worse in my left ring and little fingers. Full restoration of sensory and motor function were never the aim of the surgery. Rather, its purpose was to prevent further degeneration and deterioration of symptoms, which could potentially lead to paralysis. This is not something I am too concerned about because I know and trust that the God who brought miraculous healing to my body before, can do it again. God will always finish what he has started.

That is why I have decided to end this blog here. So all that remains is for me to thank you all for sharing this journey with me and for being my companions on this adventure. May God bless you and your loved ones and fill your lives with Love, Joy and Freedom.

Meanwhile, I will try to remember to practise my physio exercises; I will make any necessary practical adaptions to my lifestyle, while reminding myself to wait on God patiently and with hopeful joy as I worship and dance again.