10 Who’s changing the atmosphere?

By the time we came to the end of November 2021, many of the previous neuropathic symptoms had returned to the left side of my body in the form of numbness, tingling, pins and needles, skin crawling and spasms. Most significantly, my left leg was heavy to move or walk and felt like jelly at the same time. I had problems with coordination when walking and was unable to dance again.

I had clumsiness and challenges with motor skills in my left hand and my fingers always felt like I was touching and manipulating objects while wearing gloves or moving through a surface of jelly.

This possibly indicated that my spinal cord was either still compressed in my neck or that there was permanent damage to the cord which was not carrying nerve signals properly. I had a piercing, stabbing pain very localised at the base of my neck. But no Lhermitte’s sign when I bent forward. That at least, was a positive.

By now I had obtained a copy of the written report of my MRI scan of the full length of my spine. I worked my way through the report which had comments on practically every one of my vertebrae. I looked up the meaning of all the technical terms and familiarised myself with the function and workings of the spinal column and the peripheral nervous system thanks to Google, Johns Hopkins and the Mayo clinic which I considered to be reputable sources of information.

I purchased diagrams of the human skeleton, muscle and nerve systems as well as a model of the spine which I regularly looked at. I used the model to help me pray specifically for the healing of the affected parts and to remind myself of what my back and spine were supposed to be like.

I had yet to hear about my appointment at the Spinal unit at King’s in London. In early December I rang and found that I had been referred to the complex spine surgery team and my appointment letter had just been posted. This sounded scary, as I believed it implied that my condition was somehow more severe. I found out curtesy of my support group, that any decompression surgery is considered complex. This was a relief as it suggested that my condition was not especially more complex than any other. When the letter finally arrived, I found that I had been offered an appointment at the end of March 2022 by telephone. To say that I was surprised and disappointed would be an understatement.

In an attempt to avoid responding in an ungodly way; by that I mean without getting angry, frustrated, whinging and complaining to anyone who would listen or using unprintable language, all of which were where my initial responses were going. I had a rant at God instead. Then I realised that I could consider it from a more positive perspective. Perhaps the specialists didn’t consider my condition to be that urgent. After all I knew that many sufferers were in far greater need than I was. More significant was the realisation that if God thought I needed to see a medical specialist more urgently, he would have made that possible.

By Christmas I was using a walking stick again. We had planned to go to France on Boxing Day so that Geof and Unique could ski, so the stick would be very necessary. As it happened, France closed their boarders due the Omicron variant of Covid so we didn’t go anywhere in the end.

Yes, of course I pondered what happened to my healing. I questioned God about it. Had I moved in a way as to compress the spinal cord and nerves again? Had my initial doubt and confusion played a part? What I began to understand from Pete Carter and ESSL was that this is not a battle fought by flesh and blood or even nerves for that matter. As in many situations, this is a spiritual battle. God’s unchanging will is to see the Kingdom of Heaven impact the earth in every area. In the spiritual realms, there are forces that do not want to see the healing power, or any transformational power of the Kingdom manifest and flourish here on earth. They will do everything in their power to subdue, negate and block the work of God, as is seen in Daniel 10. They do this in all sorts of crafty ways; seizing upon the tiniest seeds of doubts, confusion and disbelief.

That is why creating a heavenly atmosphere wherever we are is so important. Spiritual warfare is the only way to combat the powers of darkness. Only light can overcome the dark.

As Christians, we often underestimate how powerful our light is.